For Denise and her family, Wear it Purple day is an important day of recognition. She admits that the teenage years were tough at times for her two gay children, and for a while, there was a real fear that they wouldn’t be accepted by their peers.
“Wear It Purple Day reminds them they’re supported and that they’re not alone. I’m so proud of them. They have grown into beautiful, caring adults, and that’s all that matters,” says Denise, who celebrates important days for the rainbow community each year with her team in Dubbo.
Denise flying the flag with her team in Dubbo
Wear It Purple Day (WIPD) was created 15 years ago, following a spate of suicides among LGBTQIA+ young people around the world. It raised global concern and highlighted the need for greater mental health and wellbeing support. Today, it remains an important reminder that LGBTQIA+ people still face challenges that often continue into adulthood.
While Australia has made significant strides in dismantling stigma and discrimination — including the passage of the Marriage Equality Act in 2017 — Denise says there is still a long way to go, particularly in regional areas.
Proud Mum: Denise shows up for her children and other LGBQTIA+ people by celebrating important rainbow community events every year
“From my experience, the further out you go, the fewer options there are. Especially in more remote towns,” she says. Denise reflects on how this contributed to the challenges in both her son and daughter’s teenage years but also noted the lack of support for both her and her husband. “I’m not sure how much has changed since then, I am not sure much has.”
And Denise is not alone in this view. The recent Charles Sturt Regional Rainbow Survey revealed that many LGBTQIA+ people in rural and regional communities continue to feel unsupported, isolated, and often pressured to hide their identities.
That is why Denise is so passionate about providing a safe space for LGBTQIA+ youth in her region at Wellways, both for her team and for the participants they support. She knows first-hand how difficult it can be for young people navigating their identity and how vital it is to have support, encouragement, and safe places to belong.
When asked what advice she has for parents in similar situations, Denise says the most important step is to show love and acceptance – and make sure children feel it.
“Be their biggest cheerleader in life, help connect them with supports or networks where they can meet other queer kids and never be afraid to involve their GP if they’re struggling. It’s important they can speak to other trusted adults about their feelings and experiences.”
Denise with her Daughter Mahalia
For parents themselves, Denise offers another piece of wisdom: “It’s okay to grieve what you thought your future would look like. It doesn’t mean you don’t love your children. It just means the future looks a little different to what you had imagined.”
Reflecting on her journey as a mother, Denise says: “I’ve learned so much from them about love, strength, resilience, and staying true to who you are, even when it’s difficult. I’m a better person for being their mother, and I feel blessed to have my children and their partners in our lives.”